Arlen’s Best Birthday Excerpt from “The Narcissist Chronicles: The Whole Story”

Copyright 2011-2024 by Lisa Maliga

I loved my birthday no matter how old I got. Our MySpace site was blessed with people who left a lot of comments wishing me a happy birthday and I just never got tired of seeing it all! I did a special birthday poem and got more blog comments that way. God, I was having fun.

On top of that, I was in love with an angel from Tupelo, Mississippi named FlowerChild. She was a divorcee who was only thirty-five and was the brightest woman I’d had the privilege to meet online thus far. She wasn’t a writer but she wrote like one, and she worked in the deli department of a supermarket where she was in charge of making those wonderful party platters.

That FlowerChild was born only ten miles from the King [of rock n roll] made me love her even more. Ironically, she wasn’t a huge Elvis fan at all; something I just happened to overlook and forgive, as she was a fan of my books and had purchased all three copies in hardcover. FlowerChild loved reading and had excelled in it back in high school. She was going to attend Mississippi State, but she got pregnant and married, yes folks, in that order, and college had to wait.

Something about her was so refreshingly different and wonderful that I decided to give up flirting forever. I loved the hell out of her. I thought about her most all the time, and then some, to the point that she’s sort of like a billboard in my brain.

If things were going well for me, that afternoon they hit a peak. I heard back from that publisher I’d been in touch with for the past few months about my short story. Seems like they liked it so much that it would be put into a sexy horror anthology, which was going to be released by year’s end! Payment was okay but potential exposure was great. Not only that, I would finally have a legitimate new writing credit! I was one very happy man.

Book link: https://www.lisamaliga.com/book-the-narcissist-chronicles-the-whole-story

Video Excerpt

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Private Dancer’s Warning ~ Book Excerpt from “The Narcissist Chronicles: The Whole Story”

By Lisa Maliga

Copyright 2011-2024

This excerpt features an email exchange from Private Dancer, one of Arlen Stevenson’s many online MySpace friends, to another woman who is in love with the zombie author. Only Arlen’s manager intercepts the missive. It serves as a strong warning about Arlen’s narcissistic ways.

Note: It’s been edited for length and the typos and misspellings are intentional to show the rawness of the exchange.

I opened up the email from Private Dancer.

I know you and Arlen have some kind of friendship going here. I know you flirt like hell that there is no harm either, well what you think is no harm. But I don’t know how far it’s gone. I am hoping I am wrong, and you didn’t go there to see him . please tell me you ddin’t and if you did, hun, all I have to say, GOD HELP YOU.

I am going to write some things I bet your bottom dollar he’s said to you. And he not only has told you, he has told all other women that he is woooing, sleeping with, or setting up to sleep with.

* Darlin, don’t listen to tehm, they don’t know what they are sayin.

* You know I love you & only you.

* Darlin I have to make those comments on the profile cause my manager tells me to cause it sells books.

* You are the most important thing to me and no one else.

* If you cant come to me, I will come to you.

* Once I [redacted] and we have sex, you know you are all mine, don’t you?

* If you come out here darlin, we will go to the lake house. Then you can meet my buddies and you can become a member of our private club.

* Once you are here darlin, I want to build you a log cabin for us to live in, and never leave. And you can manage and help me with the myspace and read my emails and comments, then you can help me weed out the ones you don’t want.

* (For those who are married) Darlin, don’t worry that you are married, I am too. She does her thing and I do mine. Your husband will never find out. We can meet some where he will never know… just you and me and have all the sex we want.

*  You are the best in the world, you are the only one I love, you’re the only one I want to be with, none of the other women know about us, so don’t tell them. Be careful with your comments, or they might get wind of us.

* He is going to tell you don’t listen to me..but I can get in touch with all the women who are already in touch with me that he did the same with. The more you keep flirting dirty with him, the more serious he will get about meeting you, and will push youinto it or coherse you to making your mind up to doing it.

* He can’t understand why all the women have this thing for him. He is just a simple Southern smalltown boy. He isn’t a saint, but he never expected this to happen. He knows how bad he can be, but that would make all the other women jealous.

Arlen has ruined some marriages but he blamed the women. He didn’t tell them to come there, or have sex with him. He says this stuff to all the women, not just you. He has all the women believeing they are the only one, right down to sex and cooking and everything else…

I am just trying to let you know what he really is like. And that he doesn’t care no more about you and your feeling than any other woman. He just loves having them eating out of his hand and thinking he is their man, their god, their sex machine…..

If you want to keep it up…fine I cant stop you. But you need to know the truth… remember if he isn’t doing things or saying things to you, he is to other women, and he will hurt them emotionally and blame them for it…

I was glad that Arlen pointed it out, and that I was quick enough to save it. I filed it, not fully contemplating what I had just read. And it was still going on.

An author of zombie fiction, Arlen J. Stevenson uses his writing ability to entice his online victims. He flirts with them via email or instant messages. But what happens when he meets his online match?

Book link: The Narcissist Chronicles: The Whole Story by Lisa Maliga

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Zombie Excerpt from “The Narcissist Chronicles: The Whole Story”

By Lisa Maliga, copyright 2011-2024

I posted my short story Zombies At The Kings Country Buffet. The comments came pouring in and I was winning more subscribers and more fans. Some of those ol’ gals were bringing in other ol’ gals. I was sent pictures of some of ‘em and lots of private email addresses and phone numbers. To say my calendar was getting kinda full was a huge understatement. God, I loved MySpace!

A few days later I found time to chat with [my manager] Helena on the IM but I had to remain hidden or else I would’ve been inundated with gals wanting to chat. We discussed the overwhelming success of my short story that had been on my web site for years, but over here it had garnered over 60 comments. Danielle in Odessa, Texas wrote about my witty horror tale, saying she was laughing and crying at the same time and she would stay far away from buffets in the future. BlueEyedBlonde wrote, in part: “you have quite a sense of humor about you (Thank GOD!!!) I enjoy your writings…”

Gillian in North Carolina: “I don’t care bout no dam zombies but what you tell me is that u got some balls great big size and I love you writeing”

Frankinzombie: “Because Im a loser baby,now why dont you kill me, that is If I turn into a zombie. Its all fantasy,we know about reality,work,hot girlfriend who likes expensive things,and talks to much while your watching a football game, giving your bud some $ to score some bud, and dosnt show up till the next day,wop-ass time,i know you been pinching my bag mo-fo,escape from reality,til zombies really happens,its comming soon”

Robbi Zombie: “Arlen, you are 1 of the finest zombie writers in your genre. Not only do you maintain a level of tension, but it’s interlaced with lots of humor. I wish I could give you 10 kudos!”

Then it happened. Some firefighter in a small town of South Hampton, Alabama wrote about wanting a speaker at his Christmas party—and the man even gave an amount. That would be enough to buy a new computer. Things were lookin’ up!

An author of zombie fiction, Arlen J. Stevenson uses his writing ability to entice his online victims. He flirts with them via email or instant messages. But what happens when he meets his online match?

Link: The Narcissist Chronicles: The Whole Story by Lisa Maliga

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I WANT YOU: Seduction Emails from a Narcissist ~ New Cover & Excerpt

By Lisa Maliga, copyright 2016

Before I became a fan of THE WALKING DEAD, I wrote about a character named Arlen J. Stevenson who was the author of zombie fiction. I chose that genre because it seemed a little different—edgier—than thrillers or science fiction.

Originally, this manuscript got some interest from an editor at a small literary press. “It sounds serious and worthy, and I appreciated the description and know exactly what you’re talking about from hard experience. I do wish you luck with it though because…it has to be said!”

When I first uploaded I WANT YOU: Seduction Emails from a Narcissist, along with my companion title, Love Me, Need Me: A Narcissist’s Tale, I designed my own cover. I’ve since stopped doing this as I prefer not fussing around with fonts. I finally got around to having the cover redesigned after combing through some stock photos and finding one of a man who resembled the Arlen I’d imagined. Art and reality merged.

Since publishing this book, I’ve learned a lot about formatting. While awaiting the cover to be designed, I had a look at the sample, noting some the spacing issues. I went through line by line and fixed the problems. By doing this, I reread the story and was struck by the online psychological game playing that abounded within the book. 

This is unlike any other book I’ve written. It took years of research before I wrote my first draft. I did encounter several versions of Arlen online and in real life. At the time, it was very difficult to be around those types of uncaring and self-centered people. But what I learned filled more than one book. 

EXCERPT:

Here’s Arlen’s email to LeeAnn [Southern Pecan is her MySpace name] after “meeting” her on September 28.

Date: September 30

LeeAnn,

You’re wise, insightful, and loving. On top of that, you radiate both a wonderful sexuality combined with a heaping dose of loyalty. All mixed together, it’s potent.

Why do I want you with all these other people around? Frankly, there’s not even a choice involved, you are simply on a different level.

I’ll make this short and sweet. I want to get to know you more, the sooner the better. If all you want is an internet friendship, fine, just tell me. But if you want the chance for more, tell me that, because that’s exactly what I want. The reason you and I both are doing this is because we both sense we’ve gotten ahold of what potentially could be the real thing for us both.

Let me know, darlin,
AJS

P.S. My marriage is not what it should be, dear, and has been for awhile. This doesn’t flatter me in the least, but even if it wasn’t, I don’t know that I could resist you.

BOOK DESCRIPTION:

The author of three zombie books uses his literary accomplishments to entice his online victims. Arlen J. Stevenson flirts heavily with several women via raw and steamy emails in order to lure them to his lake house. His MySpace site has amassed thousands of potential victims. “I WANT YOU: Seduction Emails from a Narcissist” shows Arlen’s arc of seduction with eighteen different women. You’ll meet poetic Southern Pecan, desperate Betsy, flirty Debra, and lonely Ginger.

The love and long-term relationships he proposes to the women lasts long enough to satisfy his ego and sexual cravings.

This unique volume can be read as either a sequel or a prequel to “Love Me Need Me: A Narcissist’s Tale.”

WARNING! “I WANT YOU: Seduction Emails from a Narcissist” may be offensive to those who dislike graphic language and sexual content.

Amazon: I WANT YOU: Seduction Emails from a Narcissist
B&N NOOK: I WANT YOU: Seduction Emails from a Narcissist
iTunes: I WANT YOU: Seduction Emails from a Narcissist
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A Naughty Narcissist’s Yuletide Greetings

By Lisa Maliga
Copyright 2011-2023

I’ve decided to include a special excerpt from The Narcissist Chronicles: The WHOLE Story as it contains a wacky Christmas scene. The narcissistic main character, Arlen J. Stevenson, is a Southern zombie author and public speaker. This scene is from a December speaking gig for firefighters and their wives in a small Southern town…

Warning: Rated PG-13!

Well, I needed to get more festive as it was warming up to be a very merry Christmas for me and I thought, well hell, who sang the best Christmas songs in the world? Me! Because I’d just composed Arlen’s Christmas Song and it was gonna get a deal with Sony Music next year.

I went back over to my briefcase and pulled out my Lucky Santa cap with the mistletoe attached to it. I removed the first one and put the new one on my head and went over to the mic and pulled it off its stand.

“Ladies and gentlemen–let me make this the best Christmas show you’ve ever attended. Why? Because there is a special Christmas treat for y’all, that’s why! This is an original musical composition!”

I cleared my throat and began singing, “Here’s your Christmas present, baby,” and smiled, shook my hips a little to warm myself up and began…

“I said, here’s your Christmas present, baby…” I was directing my vocal offerings at Daisy, the sexy ol gal in the back of the room and smiled at her, swishing my hips slowly back and forth, hinting that later on in the evening me and her could share some naked rockin’ and rollin’ in my motel room. I wished to hell she read minds, as I was getting hotter than hell thinking of what that ol gal must be like in the sack. She seemed to be grooving on it too, but I thought maybe I should continue on and do something Christmassy first before coming onto her up close and personal-like.

“Are you gonna pull my red ribbon tonight?” I warbled in a loud, musical voice. “Red ribbon…and if I’m lucky you’ll take it through the back door…” I went over to the Christmas tree at the back of the stage and admired it as I sang: “Oh I’m your Christmas present, baby…” extending the lyrics, fondling a large gold ornament, but not quite expecting it to crash to the stage floor and break loudly, but not nearly as loud as my strong tenor.

Time to get off the stage, and I switched hands on the mic and walked into the crowd, working it like the paid professional public speaker/singer I proudly am. I began slowly clapping in time to my singing and encouraging the audience to follow me, even clapping my hands above my head a few times. But they just sat there like some of my zombie characters.

I was making my way over to the sexy broad, but I stopped in front of a grandmaesque fat woman with a few tufts of cotton candy blue hair and thought of singing Blue Christmas to her, but decided to keep on singing what I was and I stood kinda close to her and rocked my hips suggestively as I sang. “Once you unwrap me, baby, you won’t need Elvis anymore!” But hell, she was too ugly to kiss so I just pretended like the mistletoe wasn’t there as I made my way over to the hottie with the big, nursable boobs.

On my way across the room I continued to sing, smiling at some ol gal in a wheelchair and deciding to flirt with her. I put my hand on the back of her chair. And I made her feel real good by pushing her wheelchair around in slow, sexy circles as I sang, “If I’d’ve been in Hollywood I’d’ve been the leading man and Elvis would work at a shoe store.”

She seemed a little bluer in the hair and redder in the face so I stopped the ride and by that time I had found my way over to Miss Daisy who was beaming up at me adoringly. Damn, I was gonna be giving her the Christmas love package a little early this year! I stripped off my sport jacket and my hips were a rockin’ back and forth and I sang directly to her “I’m your Christmas present, baby, touch me and watch your present growwwww”. I extended my arms to show how much, and was gonna lean on in to the sexiest woman in the room and get my mistletoe over her head and get my reward…

And that’s when some porky ol gal comes up behind me, interrupting me, by informing me: “Thank you Arlen J. Stevenson for your, uh, performance. But it looks like it’s time for our dinner to be served. Please join us!”

I smiled tightly at her and nodded in thanks. Some fat slob who thought dinner was more important than my groinal gratification had just interrupted my spectacular holiday musical performance.

Learn more about this book here: The Narcissist Chronicles: The WHOLE Story

“The Narcissist Chronicles: The WHOLE Story” plus an Arlen in Action Excerpt

By Lisa Maliga

Copyright 2011-2015

Here’s a new excerpt from the eBook The Narcissist Chronicles: The WHOLE Story. Read about Arlen Stevenson’s first meeting with a woman he met online. A woman who sent him naked pictures of herself and is a fan of his zombie books. Mavis Preston is a lonely divorcée who enjoys trash talking with Arlen via IM and email. How will their planned weekend rendezvous turn out?

“Hello? Is this Arlen?” asked a breathy high voice.

“The one and only. I’m at this address here, numbered 6656 Bel…”

“Arlen, you’re here! Now!?” the phone clicked.

I looked up to see a stout woman with graying tightly permed curls and a pair of oversized glasses popular during the Reagan era, rushing toward me, her powder blue tracksuit emphasizing her undulating bulges and ripples. I pocketed my phone and embraced her, as I knew that was expected of me. I hid my disappointment beneath my pasted on smile—she looked absolutely nothing like those pictures she had sent…

Once I was inside her recently built home, I was impressed enough with the two story living room sporting a marble fireplace and walls containing built-in bookshelves. There was a large deck outside and a brand new gas grill that looked like it would cook lotsa steaks, burgers, hot dogs, and a few lobsters. The biggest turn on was the master bedroom with the elaborate king sized bed below a mirrored ceiling, plush beige carpeting which I wanted to test out when I got to some of my advanced sexual techniques, and the whirlpool tub in the adjacent bathroom made her look a whole lot better. Maybe ole Mavis was as good as she’d wrote.

When we went into her writing room, I saw that her computer was a laptop off in a corner next to a sewing machine and for some reason that disturbed me. Other than her bedroom, the suburban home seemed so normal and unsensual. Maybe it was the presence of a teenager; a door that was decorated on the outside with a poster of Hannah Montana, and remained closed because I doubted the woman wanted me to see evidence of her offspring. “Jeffrey, my only son! He’ll be spending the weekend with his father, like I told you earlier,” she assured me. The 4,000 square foot home was all ours from Friday through Sunday afternoon.

“I want you to autograph some books,” Mavis declared, leading me back downstairs into the living room. She immediately went over to a section and pulled out all three of my hardcovers, and I reasoned she didn’t break the bank to buy ‘em. Naturally, I always preferred it when they bought the more expensive and longer lasting version, and she happily handed them over.

“Why sure, Mavis, I’d love to…” hell, I just loved the fact that people actually bought my books and then wanted me to scribble in ‘em! I obliged her, thinking I was glad I’d left my overnight bag in the truck.

After the impromptu autograph signing, I pulled out my keys. “Mavis, I haven’t had a lot to eat today. Let’s say you and me go pick something up…”

“Nonsense, I won’t hear of it, Arlen. Why don’t I fix you a sub? I can make it to your liking…” she smiled suggestively.

 

Amazon Kindle version: The Narcissist Chronicles: The Whole Story

Amazon UK Kindle version: The Narcissist Chronicles: The Whole Story

Barnes & Noble version: The Narcissist Chronicles: The Whole Story

http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/narcissist-chronicles-lisa-maliga/1102941036?ean=2940012919106

iTunes version: The Narcissist Chronicles: The Whole Story

https://itunes.apple.com/us/book/id664385143

Kobo version: The Narcissist Chronicles: The Whole Story

http://store.kobobooks.com/en-US/ebook/the-narcissist-chronicles-the-whole-story-1

Scribd version: The Narcissist Chronicles: The Whole Story https://www.scribd.com/book/230453823/The-Narcissist-Chronicles-The-WHOLE-Story

Smashwords version: The Narcissist Chronicles: The Whole Story

https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/86256

Love Me, Need Me: A Narcissist’s Tale – ‘Author’s Advocate’ Excerpt

By Lisa Maliga

Copyright 2010 – 2013

Read about the adventures of a bumbling sexual predator that uses the Internet trolling for conquests. Arlen J. Stevenson, a hack zombie author from Alabama, ends up on large social networking site hoping to be the most popular writer there. What happens to him is a fusion of dark humor and unexpected consequences.

Here’s an edited [from R-rated to PG-rated] excerpt from Chapter 5. Enter the mind of a narcissist, as seen from his point of view.

I was languishing in my popularity as the best author’s advocate on the entire Internet. I had to wade through a lot of email lately; many of it from horny ol’ gals way more outspoken than Helena. Some of them could string together their sentences while others were in the deluded state of thinking they were writers but hardly able to use words intelligently.

Up in North Carolina I had a minor author’s advocate just itching like a tick to see me real soon. She was north of fifty, but raring to go. She sweetly wrote to me, “Arlen I just have to have you now and if that’s too blunt for you…” No, Katelynn Brenner, that’s exactly my speed. Now. I want everything now, always have, always will. And if you’re horny and I’m horny, well hell, that’s just the best combination in the whole wide world and then some.    

Katelynn knew I was married, but that wasn’t a problem. It’d be a done deal as soon as she scraped her pennies together from her cheating dog of a husband. Katelynn clearly wanted me so bad and be happy with just being my weekend buddy. Hell, name the time, date and place and we’d be ready for our Friday through Sunday buddy-fest.

Then there was the matter of Candice. She was a hack PP [Promises Publishers] writer who’d never amount to anything literarily, but she came from a decent family and had lots of money. Divorced, three teenagers, a chubby ol’ gal who lived in Georgia and was willing to meet with me any day or night of the week. I had to hint to a longterm relationship as she might’ve been horny but she was kinda on the needy side. Gals like that needed reassurance and that came in the form of the words: “longterm” “relationship” and the seal the deal phrase: “I can see us being together for a long, long time.” I also wasn’t above and beyond throwing in the word “love” here and there, but my strict rule was never before the fifth email exchange. I usually phrased it like this: “I am slowly but surely falling in love with you,” but that was reserved for the real hardcore “in need cases” as I referred to ’em. So far there had only been a few, and I closely monitored them for a potentially sticky situation.

I knew when that verbiage landed in their inboxes I was almost assured of being in their personal inboxes for real. Being the online personage I was, I never knew for sure if some ol’ gal would post pictures of me and the happily “Arlenized” ol’ gal up all over her site and the Reality Writes forum, the “private party page” which was a pretty wild place of writers exchanging some juicy tales. Meeting the women had to be done judiciously. Locals and near-locals were the best because the cost factor didn’t really enter the equation, as no motel rooms were needed. ‘Course they could turn into stalkers and I was god damned lucky that I hadn’t had to deal with that recently. 

Love Me, Need Me: A Narcissist’s Tale is available in paperback and eBook formats.