Meeting Mel Gibson ~ Excerpt from “Diary of a Hollywood Nobody”

Copyright 2011-2024 by Lisa Maliga

Thursday, May 18

I was sentenced to eight hours in the legal department at Warner Bros. The lawyer’s secretary was pregnant and all she did was sit behind her desk and talk on the phone. The lawyer, Mr. Manic, was civil to me at first. He sauntered in around 10:30 and disappeared into his office on the other side of the suite. Preggers sat in the large reception area and I was squeezed into a file room with a desk on the other side of the secretary’s office. The water cooler was beside the desk and he came over to fill up a mug and hand me his car keys! Mr. Manic told me to go down to his car, a Jaguar convertible, and retrieve his briefcase.

I loped downstairs, glad to get out into the sunny day and check out his wheels. It was a white Jag. with a matching leather interior and it sure smelled clean and new when I opened the door. Then I saw the briefcase. It wasn’t the standard issue case made of imported leather; it was quadruple sized and HEAVY! As I lugged it out of the car, I almost dropped the damn thing.  That it contained books was evident–but all 26 volumes of the Encyclopedia Britannica

The briefcase never left the ground. Having to go upstairs in the elevatorless Admin. building meant that the case rested on each step. Mr. Manic was having me, someone who was probably half his weight, play pack mule? Why? Did he hate temps?

The endearing Mr. Manic also had his car washed for him. A man stopped by and asked Preggers for the car keys so the Jag. could be washed and the gas tank filled. I’d happened to be in the reception area doing some file organizing so I witnessed the man pocketing the keys. I wanted to tell him to make sure he left the top down and hit every phone pole on the way back!

Preggers had me “run” to the mailroom to drop off some important letters. Just as I was rounding a corner, I barely avoided slamming into an equally surprised Mel Gibson! Those famous blue eyes were huge; we were just inches from a collision!

Book link: Diary of a Hollywood Nobody

Visually-Enhanced Book Excerpt

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Arlen’s Best Birthday Excerpt from “The Narcissist Chronicles: The Whole Story”

Copyright 2011-2024 by Lisa Maliga

I loved my birthday no matter how old I got. Our MySpace site was blessed with people who left a lot of comments wishing me a happy birthday and I just never got tired of seeing it all! I did a special birthday poem and got more blog comments that way. God, I was having fun.

On top of that, I was in love with an angel from Tupelo, Mississippi named FlowerChild. She was a divorcee who was only thirty-five and was the brightest woman I’d had the privilege to meet online thus far. She wasn’t a writer but she wrote like one, and she worked in the deli department of a supermarket where she was in charge of making those wonderful party platters.

That FlowerChild was born only ten miles from the King [of rock n roll] made me love her even more. Ironically, she wasn’t a huge Elvis fan at all; something I just happened to overlook and forgive, as she was a fan of my books and had purchased all three copies in hardcover. FlowerChild loved reading and had excelled in it back in high school. She was going to attend Mississippi State, but she got pregnant and married, yes folks, in that order, and college had to wait.

Something about her was so refreshingly different and wonderful that I decided to give up flirting forever. I loved the hell out of her. I thought about her most all the time, and then some, to the point that she’s sort of like a billboard in my brain.

If things were going well for me, that afternoon they hit a peak. I heard back from that publisher I’d been in touch with for the past few months about my short story. Seems like they liked it so much that it would be put into a sexy horror anthology, which was going to be released by year’s end! Payment was okay but potential exposure was great. Not only that, I would finally have a legitimate new writing credit! I was one very happy man.

Book link: https://www.lisamaliga.com/book-the-narcissist-chronicles-the-whole-story

Video Excerpt

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Private Dancer’s Warning ~ Book Excerpt from “The Narcissist Chronicles: The Whole Story”

By Lisa Maliga

Copyright 2011-2024

This excerpt features an email exchange from Private Dancer, one of Arlen Stevenson’s many online MySpace friends, to another woman who is in love with the zombie author. Only Arlen’s manager intercepts the missive. It serves as a strong warning about Arlen’s narcissistic ways.

Note: It’s been edited for length and the typos and misspellings are intentional to show the rawness of the exchange.

I opened up the email from Private Dancer.

I know you and Arlen have some kind of friendship going here. I know you flirt like hell that there is no harm either, well what you think is no harm. But I don’t know how far it’s gone. I am hoping I am wrong, and you didn’t go there to see him . please tell me you ddin’t and if you did, hun, all I have to say, GOD HELP YOU.

I am going to write some things I bet your bottom dollar he’s said to you. And he not only has told you, he has told all other women that he is woooing, sleeping with, or setting up to sleep with.

* Darlin, don’t listen to tehm, they don’t know what they are sayin.

* You know I love you & only you.

* Darlin I have to make those comments on the profile cause my manager tells me to cause it sells books.

* You are the most important thing to me and no one else.

* If you cant come to me, I will come to you.

* Once I [redacted] and we have sex, you know you are all mine, don’t you?

* If you come out here darlin, we will go to the lake house. Then you can meet my buddies and you can become a member of our private club.

* Once you are here darlin, I want to build you a log cabin for us to live in, and never leave. And you can manage and help me with the myspace and read my emails and comments, then you can help me weed out the ones you don’t want.

* (For those who are married) Darlin, don’t worry that you are married, I am too. She does her thing and I do mine. Your husband will never find out. We can meet some where he will never know… just you and me and have all the sex we want.

*  You are the best in the world, you are the only one I love, you’re the only one I want to be with, none of the other women know about us, so don’t tell them. Be careful with your comments, or they might get wind of us.

* He is going to tell you don’t listen to me..but I can get in touch with all the women who are already in touch with me that he did the same with. The more you keep flirting dirty with him, the more serious he will get about meeting you, and will push youinto it or coherse you to making your mind up to doing it.

* He can’t understand why all the women have this thing for him. He is just a simple Southern smalltown boy. He isn’t a saint, but he never expected this to happen. He knows how bad he can be, but that would make all the other women jealous.

Arlen has ruined some marriages but he blamed the women. He didn’t tell them to come there, or have sex with him. He says this stuff to all the women, not just you. He has all the women believeing they are the only one, right down to sex and cooking and everything else…

I am just trying to let you know what he really is like. And that he doesn’t care no more about you and your feeling than any other woman. He just loves having them eating out of his hand and thinking he is their man, their god, their sex machine…..

If you want to keep it up…fine I cant stop you. But you need to know the truth… remember if he isn’t doing things or saying things to you, he is to other women, and he will hurt them emotionally and blame them for it…

I was glad that Arlen pointed it out, and that I was quick enough to save it. I filed it, not fully contemplating what I had just read. And it was still going on.

An author of zombie fiction, Arlen J. Stevenson uses his writing ability to entice his online victims. He flirts with them via email or instant messages. But what happens when he meets his online match?

Book link: The Narcissist Chronicles: The Whole Story by Lisa Maliga

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Out of the Blue: A Novel ~ Video Excerpt

Copyright 2014-2024 by Lisa Maliga

The month of August was sweltering. Sylvia Gardner was unaware of how the heat would affect her on a Thursday afternoon during the second week of over 95-degree temperatures. Images of Jamaica held far less appeal than they did during the winter months. The thought of visiting Bob Marley’s country faded.

It was her day off from her cashiering job at Jenson’s Drugstore. She was taking advantage of the air-conditioned climate. The movie was Splendor in the Grass starring Warren Beatty and Natalie Wood. The Zenith TV stood in the corner of the living room on a faux wood grain wheeled cart. Beneath it was stored the new TV Guide, along with the Richport News entertainment section, and the monthly PBS magazine. 

She switched on the TV, knowing the movie would be on by the time she returned from the kitchen. She could enjoy the movie, sip from a bottle of ice cold 7 Up from the freezer, and maybe indulge in a few handfuls of potato chips. Oh yeah, and that container of French onion dip from Kroger was still on the second shelf of the fridge.

Odd, she thought. It hadn’t done that in a while. As she was about to switch back, the picture sharpened even more and she was attracted to the verdant landscape. Something about the bucolic setting captivated Sylvia.

 And that was how it all began.

book link: Out of the Blue: A Novel

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Zombie Excerpt from “The Narcissist Chronicles: The Whole Story”

By Lisa Maliga, copyright 2011-2024

I posted my short story Zombies At The Kings Country Buffet. The comments came pouring in and I was winning more subscribers and more fans. Some of those ol’ gals were bringing in other ol’ gals. I was sent pictures of some of ‘em and lots of private email addresses and phone numbers. To say my calendar was getting kinda full was a huge understatement. God, I loved MySpace!

A few days later I found time to chat with [my manager] Helena on the IM but I had to remain hidden or else I would’ve been inundated with gals wanting to chat. We discussed the overwhelming success of my short story that had been on my web site for years, but over here it had garnered over 60 comments. Danielle in Odessa, Texas wrote about my witty horror tale, saying she was laughing and crying at the same time and she would stay far away from buffets in the future. BlueEyedBlonde wrote, in part: “you have quite a sense of humor about you (Thank GOD!!!) I enjoy your writings…”

Gillian in North Carolina: “I don’t care bout no dam zombies but what you tell me is that u got some balls great big size and I love you writeing”

Frankinzombie: “Because Im a loser baby,now why dont you kill me, that is If I turn into a zombie. Its all fantasy,we know about reality,work,hot girlfriend who likes expensive things,and talks to much while your watching a football game, giving your bud some $ to score some bud, and dosnt show up till the next day,wop-ass time,i know you been pinching my bag mo-fo,escape from reality,til zombies really happens,its comming soon”

Robbi Zombie: “Arlen, you are 1 of the finest zombie writers in your genre. Not only do you maintain a level of tension, but it’s interlaced with lots of humor. I wish I could give you 10 kudos!”

Then it happened. Some firefighter in a small town of South Hampton, Alabama wrote about wanting a speaker at his Christmas party—and the man even gave an amount. That would be enough to buy a new computer. Things were lookin’ up!

An author of zombie fiction, Arlen J. Stevenson uses his writing ability to entice his online victims. He flirts with them via email or instant messages. But what happens when he meets his online match?

Link: The Narcissist Chronicles: The Whole Story by Lisa Maliga

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Buttery Chocolate Brownie Recipe + Video

By Lisa Maliga copyright 2014-2017

chocolatebutterbrownieschocbrowniesstack2From the book THE GREAT BROWNIE TASTE-OFF (THE YOLANDA’S YUMMERY SERIES, BOOK 1).

I haven’t made these brownies in a couple of years, so when I followed the recipe, I rediscovered the joy of a very rich and decadent buttery brownie. I took a lot of photos of the process and have turned them into a cool video that shows you the various steps.

Even if you’ve only made brownies from a mix, this is an easy recipe to make.

Here are some tips to make your buttery brownies taste even better!

♥ Your butter should be a good quality and unsalted is recommended. For the record, I used Plugra.

♥ Use eggs from chickens that are free to roam around, as they taste better.

♥ I used an 8″ x 8″ glass baking dish. You can use a 9″ x 9″ glass or metal baking dish if you prefer but the brownies will be slightly flatter. Instead of using cooking spray, just use the butter wrapper to grease your baking dish.

INGREDIENTS:

1/2 cup [1 stick] butter, melted and cooled

1 cup brown sugar

2 eggs [room temperature]

1/4 cup [2 ounces] dark chocolate, melted, cooled slightly

1 teaspoon vanilla extract

1/2 cup all-purpose flour

INSTRUCTIONS:

Preheat oven to 325 degrees.

Grease your pan with either cooking spray or butter.

In a large bowl, beat butter and sugar until combined.

Add an egg, mix in well, then add the second egg and mix well.

Stir in melted chocolate and vanilla.

Gently fold in flour, until combined.

Pour mixture into pan and bake for 25 minutes, or until a toothpick inserted in the center comes out clean. Let the brownies cool completely. Cut into squares. Enjoy.

great brownie taste-off yolanda's yummery series book 1 free ebookYou can get a copy of THE GREAT BROWNIE TASTE-OFF (THE YOLANDA’S YUMMERY SERIES, BOOK 1). Best of all, the eBook version is FREE!

Book Links:

Paperback Edition: The Great Brownie Taste-off

Amazon: The Great Brownie Taste-off
Amazon UK: The Great Brownie Taste-off
B&N Nook: The Great Brownie Taste-off
iTunes: The Great Brownie Taste-off
Kobo: The Great Brownie Taste-off
Scribd: The Great Brownie Taste-off
Smashwords: The Great Brownie Taste-off

Video:

 

 

 

I WANT YOU: Seduction Emails from a Narcissist ~ New Cover & Excerpt

By Lisa Maliga, copyright 2016

iwantyou (1)Before I became a fan of THE WALKING DEAD, I wrote about a character named Arlen J. Stevenson who was the author of zombie fiction. I chose that genre because it seemed a little different—edgier—than thrillers or science fiction.

Originally, this manuscript got some interest from an editor at a small literary press. “It sounds serious and worthy, and I appreciated the description and know exactly what you’re talking about from hard experience. I do wish you luck with it though because…it has to be said!”

When I first uploaded I WANT YOU: Seduction Emails from a Narcissist, along with my companion title, Love Me, Need Me: A Narcissist’s Tale, I designed my own cover. I’ve since stopped doing this as I prefer not fussing around with fonts. I finally got around to having the cover redesigned after combing through some stock photos and finding one of a man who resembled the Arlen I’d imagined. Art and reality merged.

Since publishing this book, I’ve learned a lot about formatting. While awaiting the cover to be designed, I had a look at the sample, noting some the spacing issues. I went through line by line and fixed the problems. By doing this, I reread the story and was struck by the online psychological game playing that abounded within the book. 

This is unlike any other book I’ve written. It took years of research before I wrote my first draft. I did encounter several versions of Arlen online and in real life. At the time, it was very difficult to be around those types of uncaring and self-centered people. But what I learned filled more than one book. 

EXCERPT:

Here’s Arlen’s email to LeeAnn [Southern Pecan is her MySpace name] after “meeting” her on September 28.

Date: September 30

LeeAnn,

You’re wise, insightful, and loving. On top of that, you radiate both a wonderful sexuality combined with a heaping dose of loyalty. All mixed together, it’s potent.

Why do I want you with all these other people around? Frankly, there’s not even a choice involved, you are simply on a different level.

I’ll make this short and sweet. I want to get to know you more, the sooner the better. If all you want is an internet friendship, fine, just tell me. But if you want the chance for more, tell me that, because that’s exactly what I want. The reason you and I both are doing this is because we both sense we’ve gotten ahold of what potentially could be the real thing for us both.

Let me know, darlin,
AJS

P.S. My marriage is not what it should be, dear, and has been for awhile. This doesn’t flatter me in the least, but even if it wasn’t, I don’t know that I could resist you.

BOOK DESCRIPTION:

The author of three zombie books uses his literary accomplishments to entice his online victims. Arlen J. Stevenson flirts heavily with several women via raw and steamy emails in order to lure them to his lake house. His MySpace site has amassed thousands of potential victims. “I WANT YOU: Seduction Emails from a Narcissist” shows Arlen’s arc of seduction with eighteen different women. You’ll meet poetic Southern Pecan, desperate Betsy, flirty Debra, and lonely Ginger.

The love and long-term relationships he proposes to the women lasts long enough to satisfy his ego and sexual cravings.

This unique volume can be read as either a sequel or a prequel to “Love Me Need Me: A Narcissist’s Tale.”

WARNING! “I WANT YOU: Seduction Emails from a Narcissist” may be offensive to those who dislike graphic language and sexual content.

Amazon: I WANT YOU: Seduction Emails from a Narcissist
B&N NOOK: I WANT YOU: Seduction Emails from a Narcissist
iTunes: I WANT YOU: Seduction Emails from a Narcissist
Kobo: I WANT YOU: Seduction Emails from a Narcissist
Scribd: I WANT YOU: Seduction Emails from a Narcissist
Smashwords: I WANT YOU: Seduction Emails from a Narcissist

 

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Ripping Readers Off: Kindle Unlimited Scam eBooks

Copyright 2016 by Lisa Maliga

Kindle-Unlimited-logo-220x86

Last April, I wrote this article: Don’t Buy or Borrow Kindle Unlimited Rip-off eBooks. 

What’s changed since then?

In July 2015, Amazon launched KU2, which pays authors by pages read. KU1 was a fluctuating amount of at least $1 per eBook borrow. The Amazonians have altered the system for their benefit and the amount per page is less than a penny –.0049 per page or less. If an author wants to make any money, they need to write longer books. And those books need to get read.

Or do they?

Nope, the author offers a free book or gift card or something for nothing and has that clickable link take the reader to the back of the book. Like magic, all the pages are read!

With the KU program, Amazon is like long defunct author’s sites Themestream and the Vines – pay per click companies that went belly up. While some legitimate authors are doing quite well, others are faring far worse than they were in KU1.

One of the main problems I’ve seen in the KU program, and this is in the nonfiction area, are foreign plagiarists stuffing books full of repetitive “information.” Or they upload their entire catalogue into one title. I’ve also seen books where the contents are available in a dozen different languages. Can you guess that the translation is run through an online translator resulting in hilarious errors?

What inspired this article was a review request from an author: someone who had been “University” educated, and an expert in various fields dating back to the early 90’s. A quick search revealed nothing except the author’s books in various Amazon stores. Here’s the email:

As an avid buyer and author on Amazon, I want readers to feel they are getting value for money and would recommend to their friends and family. I feel this book meets that requirement.

 I was hoping you could review a books and leave an honest review.

If you are interested I can send you the book as a gift free of charge.

 I saw that the title wasn’t unique and when looking at the author page I noticed:

“She has a passion for sharing his experience…”

Bruce/Caitlyn Jenner? Nope, someone who just didn’t care about proofreading their bio or who wasn’t too fluent in English.

There are many excellent titles in the KU program. But I’m going to point out potential rip-off titles that are often plagiarized from websites, blogs and Pinterest. By reading this article, you’ll learn how to avoid downloading or wasting your time and money on rip-offs and supporting scammers.

If you’re a reader who wants to learn how to bake cupcakes, wouldn’t you want to read a book by someone who has baked the recipes and can provide photos along with helpful tips? I want that! A few weeks ago, I mistakenly downloaded a scam book. At first I thought, oh goodie, 600 pages of cupcake recipes and information—all for 0.00. Wrong! 600 pages of drivel, NO pictures, and recipe after recipe of things I didn’t want to bake. The few cupcake recipes were so generic that one of them listed cake mix. I deleted that eBook.

Spot Those Scammy eBooks

Here are some things to look for when shopping at Amazon.

kindle unlimited logo * No author biography

If there’s no bio, there’s no way of knowing how much knowledge they have pertaining to the subject they’ve written about. There won’t be an email address, website, Etsy page or social media information such as Twitter, Pinterest or Face Book. They have no blog or newsletter.

kindle unlimited logo * Fake Author Biography

Some of the scammers have gotten smarter and include biographies and even pictures or illustrations of themselves. Read it carefully and you’ll see it’s false if no professional training is indicated. Or they might mention a school or university. How is the bio worded—in proper English or does it read as if it was translated from another language?

kindle unlimited logo * Common American Names

This is another way to lure borrowers and buyers—by using familiar surnames like Thomas, Brown, Mitchell, White, etc. It’s also how those from other countries make names seem more acceptable than their own. Authors who use several pseudonyms may do so to avoid detection. It’s also a way of using a name like a keyword – to attract more borrows and sales.

 

kindle unlimited logo * Poor Translating

Foreign authors may have run the manuscript through an online translator resulting in unintentionally hilarious reading. My favorite was the one about heating your soap over a “weak fire.” Some of the faux fiction scam books have incredibly bad titles.

kindle unlimited logo * Offer FREE Bonus/Gift at the BACK of the eBook

This encourages you to click the link and get the page reads. You won’t be able to miss this offer as it’ll be shown in very large and colorful fonts. It may appear more than once.

kindle unlimited logo * Very LONG eBooks

KU1 featured scamlets of 50 pages or less. Now the less is more motto has been replaced with the more [pages] the merrier! One trick I discovered is seeing lengthy books enhanced by offering the book in a dozen different languages. You can also bet that a professional human translator doesn’t translate, as that would be very expensive and time consuming. Ultimately, no one benefits.

Another method is for the scamming “author” to take several books and rearrange the order so the book becomes bloated with excess pages. You get a bundle of books you [probably] don’t care to read.

kindle unlimited logo * LONG Titles Stuffed with Keywords

Example: Homemade Body Butter: 25 Natural Body Butter And Lotion Recipes To Keep Your Skin Smooth And Feeling Moisturized! (How To Body Butter, DIY Body Butter, Natural Body Butter And Lotion Recipes).

kindle unlimited logo * Enticing Cover Photo of the Product[s]

A rip-off will be revealed if the featured product[s] recipe and photo aren’t included inside the eBook. For example, a stack of oatmeal soap on the cover, yet there is no oatmeal soap recipe in the rip-off title. Also, most rip-off eBooks won’t contain any photos.

kindle unlimited logo * If recipes are included, they may be in a mixture of ounces, grams, tablespoons and teaspoons, which is very confusing for the reader.

kindle unlimited logo * No medical or legal disclaimer. No safety precautions.

kindle unlimited logo * The name on the cover may be spelled differently than the name on the book’s Amazon page.

In order to avoid being ripped off, please use this article as a checklist.

Also, read what author Ann Christy has written about this topic. She includes in-depth analysis along with screenshots of some flagrant examples. http://www.annchristy.com/anatomy-of-ku-scams

 

Out of the Blue: A Novel ~ Meet Sylvia’s Mother

By Lisa Maliga

Copyright 2014-2015

out of the blue a novel by lisa maliga

It all began in the summer of 1979 …

Sylvia Gardner is a naïve library clerk who lives with her dysfunctional mother in Richport, Illinois. Vivian tells her daughter not to trust men because they only want to use her. After being dumped by her first boyfriend, Sylvia falls in love with an English actor after watching him on a PBS drama. Researching Alexander Thorpe’s life and career for two years, she saves her money so she can visit him in his Cotswolds village. She stays at the Windrush Arms Hotel, soon discovering they share a secret connection.

Complications ensue when Harry Livingstone, the hotel’s drunken proprietor, takes a fancy to the young American. As in her dreams, Sylvia and Alexander get together – but with unexpected results.

In this flashback scene we learn more about Sylvia’s mother.

Her mother would’ve disliked Alexander, even though he was a well-known actor. She would have referred to him as a dissipated old lecher for he was a man. An older man. And of course since he was a man, he wanted to get his rocks off. Vivian feared her daughter would wind up as unhappy as she had been once she got married.

After all, her mother had married an older man—Fred Gardner was almost a dozen years older than Vivian. But after the divorce and the move into the apartment complex, Sylvia found a small beige photo album when moving boxes in the garage. She sat down on a lawn chair and opened it up. A smiling Vivian looked at the camera. It was taken from the waist up and she recognized the canary yellow polyester minidress that her mother had bought back in 1969. It was always worn with white vinyl go go boots. Her dark hair was center parted and hung in loose curls just past her narrow shoulders. Her mom looked a lot younger in that picture. She turned the page and saw a bearded man standing next to Vivian. His long hair was thick and curly. A folded red bandana was wrapped around his head. Who was that man?

If you’d like to read more, OUT OF THE BLUE: A NOVEL is available at the following online bookstores:

Paperback: Out of the Blue: A Novel
Paperback UK: Out of the Blue: A Novel

Amazon Kindle: Out of the Blue: A Novel
Amazon Kindle UK: Out of the Blue: A Novel
B&N [Nook]: Out of the Blue: A Novel
iTunes: Out of the Blue: A Novel
Smashwords: Out of the Blue: A Novel
Kobo: Out of the Blue: A Novel

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70% of Nothing: The Reality of Indie Publishing

By Lisa Maliga, Copyright 2015

computerscreenI barely passed basic math in seventh grade, but I’ve learned a lot about numbers, percentages and book rankings since 2010.

On October 21, I released my $2.99 novel, Notes from Nadir, which I had serialized via my blog of the same title. The price was chosen because I would earn a 70% royalty rate. I sold four copies the first month, the same number in November, and soon the book was ignored.

By February 2011, I had five novels on Amazon and a few other stores. The titles were previously published online and I had regained my full rights. Sales in the dawn of e-publishing [2000-2004] were minimal and I noticed nothing had changed, except that I was now doing all the work.

I self-published my nonfiction titles as I had extensive experience making soap and bath and body products. Over time, my eBooks were available on 12 other Amazon marketplaces like the UK, Canada, Australia, Italy, Germany, etc. I uploaded titles to B&N, Smashwords, Kobo, CreateSpace [paperbacks], iTunes, and Draft2Digital. I joined AuthorsDen, Manic Readers, Twitter, Face Book and WordPress. I’ve had my own website since 2001 and this year I launched a newsletter and offered free eBooks. I have two instructional videos and two book trailers on YouTube, and I joined Pinterest because I like photography.

When it comes to nonfiction books, I’ve discovered that it’s exceedingly difficult to get linkbacks/mentions from companies/sources that are listed. I revised one of my titles to include several photos and interview some suppliers. While I provide their links and contact information, they won’t add a link to my eBook on their website, nor mention it in a newsletter/blog.

Why are those listed suppliers unable to provide a link? I’m asking for no money and in many cases have even spent money on their product[s]! I offered them a free copy of my eBook in their preferred format.

Don’t these suppliers realize that they can make money from eBooks? Should a consumer read it and want to buy supplies, that supplier has just picked up some biz? Also, if a supplier has an Amazon or B&N affiliate link, they’ll get money for each copy sold from their website. [I realize that not all websites sell via Amazon/B&N].

Indie writers are easy to ignore. They have no agents, managers or publicists to get the word of their eBooks out there. Ironically, while many of the bath and body suppliers are fond of the term FAIR TRADE, they won’t do a simple link exchange which would actually benefit their own company!

But I kept writing until my titles increased from 1 to 32, almost evenly divided between fiction and nonfiction. Contrary to the myth that more books equal more sales, I’ve found the opposite to be true. As of August 2015, I have 7 more titles yet I’ve earned 30% less than I did in June 2014 on Amazon.

Approximately 90,000 eBooks are released on Amazon every month. The chances of any book being seen are in the league of unlikely to very unlikely.

How does a writer earn a decent living by writing eBooks? Four years ago, I saw a pattern. They wrote an eBook or two, especially a series or serial, blogged, went to other authors’ blogs and left comments. Those other authors had a larger following, so the neophyte eBook author sucked up to the “bigger authors” and dished out excellent book reviews, hoping to get the same treatment for their books. Even after that exhausting circle of writing, praising other writers, and occasionally having other writers praise you, they still hadn’t seen an increase in book sales. Others have speculated that at the start of the self-pubbing boom, some authors bought dozens of good reviews on Fiverr, thus launching their careers.  A self-published author/blogger exhorted their followers to write a book, write a second book, a third, and repeat indefinitely. Unsurprisingly, that author wrote a book about how to write and market books.

After releasing my twentieth title, I thought there would be more sales. I uploaded a horror novella that had small blocks of white spaces appearing randomly throughout the book. No one contacted me about it because I never sold a single copy of the aptly titled An Author’s Nightmare.

Since then, I’ve changed how I perceive indie publishing. Whenever I upload an eBook, or even a paperback edition, it’s not publishing, it’s uploading a manuscript. I also uploaded three freebies; hoping readers would discover my other titles. Occasionally, they did.

So, how does an “indie” author get noticed? By advertising?

Advertisers are popping up all over the place like psychedelic mushrooms. They’ll send your book’s links to the best potential customers — readers. Sometimes grand promises are made of thousands of readers willing to download or buy your book. I tried getting a $2.99 novel out to 106,000 Face Book fans. The result? Zip. I could have done that myself, as I’m a member of more than 50 book-related groups. In fact, I have. The result has been similar. With some advertisers, you’ll get a few sales or a few hundred downloads for a freebie. Then what? Not much. Your book plummets in rank, maybe you get a review or two, and the title rests in obscurity with hundreds of thousands of unread eBooks on Amazon, B&N and other online bookstores.

Getting lots of downloads of freebies is meaningless if no one buys your other titles. There’s another myth about more reviews attracting more sales. Sometimes it’s true, especially if they’re legitimate reviews by readers. Yet how many people actually read and review those freebies?

After my years in indie publishing, I’ve learned that only a few authors can make a lot of money. I’ve earned far less than I did when I was temping.

Being an author isn’t unique any more. Self-publishing is for anyone who can process some words, design a book cover or have one made for a few dollars. Many books aren’t even proofread, let alone edited. With the glut of available reading material, it’s almost impossible for an author’s book[s] to stand out. Most eBooks will plunge to the murky depths of internet bookstores far, far away from the best sellers. They’ll wind up with six or seven-digit rankings, doomed to obscurity.

Most people don’t read. Most people don’t buy eBooks or prefer downloading freebies. And most readers don’t review books.

And that’s what I’ve learned about selling eBooks [and paperbacks] for almost half a decade.

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