I WANT YOU: Seduction Emails from a Narcissist ~ New Cover & Excerpt

By Lisa Maliga, copyright 2016

iwantyou (1)Before I became a fan of THE WALKING DEAD, I wrote about a character named Arlen J. Stevenson who was the author of zombie fiction. I chose that genre because it seemed a little different—edgier—than thrillers or science fiction.

Originally, this manuscript got some interest from an editor at a small literary press. “It sounds serious and worthy, and I appreciated the description and know exactly what you’re talking about from hard experience. I do wish you luck with it though because…it has to be said!”

When I first uploaded I WANT YOU: Seduction Emails from a Narcissist, along with my companion title, Love Me, Need Me: A Narcissist’s Tale, I designed my own cover. I’ve since stopped doing this as I prefer not fussing around with fonts. I finally got around to having the cover redesigned after combing through some stock photos and finding one of a man who resembled the Arlen I’d imagined. Art and reality merged.

Since publishing this book, I’ve learned a lot about formatting. While awaiting the cover to be designed, I had a look at the sample, noting some the spacing issues. I went through line by line and fixed the problems. By doing this, I reread the story and was struck by the online psychological game playing that abounded within the book. 

This is unlike any other book I’ve written. It took years of research before I wrote my first draft. I did encounter several versions of Arlen online and in real life. At the time, it was very difficult to be around those types of uncaring and self-centered people. But what I learned filled more than one book. 


Here’s Arlen’s email to LeeAnn [Southern Pecan is her MySpace name] after “meeting” her on September 28.

Date: September 30


You’re wise, insightful, and loving. On top of that, you radiate both a wonderful sexuality combined with a heaping dose of loyalty. All mixed together, it’s potent.

Why do I want you with all these other people around? Frankly, there’s not even a choice involved, you are simply on a different level.

I’ll make this short and sweet. I want to get to know you more, the sooner the better. If all you want is an internet friendship, fine, just tell me. But if you want the chance for more, tell me that, because that’s exactly what I want. The reason you and I both are doing this is because we both sense we’ve gotten ahold of what potentially could be the real thing for us both.

Let me know, darlin,

P.S. My marriage is not what it should be, dear, and has been for awhile. This doesn’t flatter me in the least, but even if it wasn’t, I don’t know that I could resist you.


The author of three zombie books uses his literary accomplishments to entice his online victims. Arlen J. Stevenson flirts heavily with several women via raw and steamy emails in order to lure them to his lake house. His MySpace site has amassed thousands of potential victims. “I WANT YOU: Seduction Emails from a Narcissist” shows Arlen’s arc of seduction with eighteen different women. You’ll meet poetic Southern Pecan, desperate Betsy, flirty Debra, and lonely Ginger.

The love and long-term relationships he proposes to the women lasts long enough to satisfy his ego and sexual cravings.

This unique volume can be read as either a sequel or a prequel to “Love Me Need Me: A Narcissist’s Tale.”

WARNING! “I WANT YOU: Seduction Emails from a Narcissist” may be offensive to those who dislike graphic language and sexual content.

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I Almost Married a Narcissist + Excerpt

By Lisa Maliga, copyright 2015. 2016

i almost married a narcissist novella lisa maligaI Almost Married a Narcissist is a new and updated story about a woman who learns the man she’s dating is more than conceited and hung up on his body image – he’s a narcissist.

When I was going through some notes about a short story I’d written “Flipping Over Grigori,” I thought that exploring his personality disorder would make this a more moving story. From 12,000 words to nearly 23,000, the expanded version reveals more about both main characters and how they get to know each other. I also changed his name from Grigori to Andrei. His last name is still Antonescu, but A.A. are now his initials; it’s symbolic of him being a source of addiction to Charlotte White, the woman who falls in love with the gymnastics coach.

Briefly, here’s what I Almost Married a Narcissist is about:

Charlotte White falls in love with a younger Romanian gymnastics coach.

Andrei Antonescu is a sexy and handsome foreigner who loves to have fun and flirt with the ladies.

The more she gets to know him, the more red flags are unfurled. Once she’s able to see past his good looks and muscular body, Charlotte is unprepared for some shocking revelations.

Excerpt from Chapter Two

Three of the coaches introduced themselves to me. I liked them right away. But there was this one, a real serious looking guy, who completely ignored me. Maybe it was his dark blond curly hair and the fact that he was so tanned and muscular. His T-shirt’s sleeves were rolled up, showing off his strong arms. He was so self absorbed that he didn’t even notice me.

Later, I got to go out into the gym, and didn’t have to remove my shoes because I was a staff member. I had to give a message to Andrei, that serious coach. That was how I finally met the younger man – right next to the parallel bars. He had just dismounted from them after showing an element to his private student, a wiry adolescent boy. After handing him the message, he grabbed it with chalky hands and thanked me quickly, not even looking at me. But I was used to being treated like that.

A few days later, I was in the coach’s lounge for my afternoon break. It was a dark, depressing day and it seemed like nothing was ever going to go right. Svetlana had yelled at me that morning for taking too long to do the reports and I wondered if I’d even last the week at the job. Andrei rushed upstairs, and I thought of how young and energetic he was. He didn’t smile at me, but he lowered his sunglasses as he asked about his schedule. All I saw were his Mediterranean blue eyes.

I wanted to take the Tuesday or Thursday night adult gymnastics class he taught. I wondered how to go about asking Svetlana about it. I knew that Eastern European coaches were able to get excellent results from their students, and by taking the class, I’d get back into shape. That afternoon, I stood near the filing cabinet when Andrei walked in, went past me, and pinched my hip! There was no one else nearby. The gesture was something most American men wouldn’t do because they’d probably end up being sued for sexual harassment.

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A Naughty Narcissist’s Yuletide Greetings

narcissist chronicles love me need me a narcissist's tale i want you seduction emails from a narcissist lisa maligaBy Lisa Maliga
Copyright 2011-2015

I’ve decided to include a special excerpt from The Narcissist Chronicles: The WHOLE Story as it contains a wacky Christmas scene. The narcissistic main character, Arlen J. Stevenson, is a Southern zombie author and public speaker. This scene is from a December speaking gig for firefighters and their wives in a small Southern town…

Warning: Rated PG-13!

Well, I needed to get more festive as it was warming up to be a very merry Christmas for me and I thought, well hell, who sang the best Christmas songs in the world? Me! Because I’d just composed Arlen’s Christmas Song and it was gonna get a deal with Sony Music next year.

I went back over to my briefcase and pulled out my Lucky Santa cap with the mistletoe attached to it. I removed the first one and put the new one on my head and went over to the mic and pulled it off its stand.

“Ladies and gentlemen–let me make this the best Christmas show you’ve ever attended. Why? Because there is a special Christmas treat for y’all, that’s why! This is an original musical composition!”

I cleared my throat and began singing, “Here’s your Christmas present, baby,” and smiled, shook my hips a little to warm myself up and began…

“I said, here’s your Christmas present, baby…” I was directing my vocal offerings at Daisy, the sexy ol gal in the back of the room and smiled at her, swishing my hips slowly back and forth, hinting that later on in the evening me and her could share some naked rockin’ and rollin’ in my motel room. I wished to hell she read minds, as I was getting hotter than hell thinking of what that ol gal must be like in the sack. She seemed to be grooving on it too, but I thought maybe I should continue on and do something Christmassy first before coming onto her up close and personal-like.

“Are you gonna pull my red ribbon tonight?” I warbled in a loud, musical voice. “Red ribbon…and if I’m lucky you’ll take it through the back door…” I went over to the Christmas tree at the back of the stage and admired it as I sang: “Oh I’m your Christmas present, baby…” extending the lyrics, fondling a large gold ornament, but not quite expecting it to crash to the stage floor and break loudly, but not nearly as loud as my strong tenor.

Time to get off the stage, and I switched hands on the mic and walked into the crowd, working it like the paid professional public speaker/singer I proudly am. I began slowly clapping in time to my singing and encouraging the audience to follow me, even clapping my hands above my head a few times. But they just sat there like some of my zombie characters.

I was making my way over to the sexy broad, but I stopped in front of a grandmaesque fat woman with a few tufts of cotton candy blue hair and thought of singing Blue Christmas to her, but decided to keep on singing what I was and I stood kinda close to her and rocked my hips suggestively as I sang. “Once you unwrap me, baby, you won’t need Elvis anymore!” But hell, she was too ugly to kiss so I just pretended like the mistletoe wasn’t there as I made my way over to the hottie with the big, nursable boobs.

On my way across the room I continued to sing, smiling at some ol gal in a wheelchair and deciding to flirt with her. I put my hand on the back of her chair. And I made her feel real good by pushing her wheelchair around in slow, sexy circles as I sang, “If I’d’ve been in Hollywood I’d’ve been the leading man and Elvis would work at a shoe store.”

She seemed a little bluer in the hair and redder in the face so I stopped the ride and by that time I had found my way over to Miss Daisy who was beaming up at me adoringly. Damn, I was gonna be giving her the Christmas love package a little early this year! I stripped off my sport jacket and my hips were a rockin’ back and forth and I sang directly to her “I’m your Christmas present, baby, touch me and watch your present growwwww”. I extended my arms to show how much, and was gonna lean on in to the sexiest woman in the room and get my mistletoe over her head and get my reward…

And that’s when some porky ol gal comes up behind me, interrupting me, by informing me: “Thank you Arlen J. Stevenson for your, uh, performance. But it looks like it’s time for our dinner to be served. Please join us!”

I smiled tightly at her and nodded in thanks. Some fat slob who thought dinner was more important than my groinal gratification had just interrupted my spectacular holiday musical performance.

Learn more about this book here: The Narcissist Chronicles: The WHOLE Story

“The Narcissist Chronicles: The WHOLE Story” plus an Arlen in Action Excerpt

narcissist chronicles love me need me a narcissist's tale i want you seduction emails from a narcissist lisa maligaBy Lisa Maliga

Copyright 2011-2015

Here’s a new excerpt from the eBook The Narcissist Chronicles: The WHOLE Story. Read about Arlen Stevenson’s first meeting with a woman he met online. A woman who sent him naked pictures of herself and is a fan of his zombie books. Mavis Preston is a lonely divorcée who enjoys trash talking with Arlen via IM and email. How will their planned weekend rendezvous turn out?

“Hello? Is this Arlen?” asked a breathy high voice.

“The one and only. I’m at this address here, numbered 6656 Bel…”

“Arlen, you’re here! Now!?” the phone clicked.

I looked up to see a stout woman with graying tightly permed curls and a pair of oversized glasses popular during the Reagan era, rushing toward me, her powder blue tracksuit emphasizing her undulating bulges and ripples. I pocketed my phone and embraced her, as I knew that was expected of me. I hid my disappointment beneath my pasted on smile—she looked absolutely nothing like those pictures she had sent…

Once I was inside her recently built home, I was impressed enough with the two story living room sporting a marble fireplace and walls containing built-in bookshelves. There was a large deck outside and a brand new gas grill that looked like it would cook lotsa steaks, burgers, hot dogs, and a few lobsters. The biggest turn on was the master bedroom with the elaborate king sized bed below a mirrored ceiling, plush beige carpeting which I wanted to test out when I got to some of my advanced sexual techniques, and the whirlpool tub in the adjacent bathroom made her look a whole lot better. Maybe ole Mavis was as good as she’d wrote.

When we went into her writing room, I saw that her computer was a laptop off in a corner next to a sewing machine and for some reason that disturbed me. Other than her bedroom, the suburban home seemed so normal and unsensual. Maybe it was the presence of a teenager; a door that was decorated on the outside with a poster of Hannah Montana, and remained closed because I doubted the woman wanted me to see evidence of her offspring. “Jeffrey, my only son! He’ll be spending the weekend with his father, like I told you earlier,” she assured me. The 4,000 square foot home was all ours from Friday through Sunday afternoon.

“I want you to autograph some books,” Mavis declared, leading me back downstairs into the living room. She immediately went over to a section and pulled out all three of my hardcovers, and I reasoned she didn’t break the bank to buy ‘em. Naturally, I always preferred it when they bought the more expensive and longer lasting version, and she happily handed them over.

“Why sure, Mavis, I’d love to…” hell, I just loved the fact that people actually bought my books and then wanted me to scribble in ‘em! I obliged her, thinking I was glad I’d left my overnight bag in the truck.

After the impromptu autograph signing, I pulled out my keys. “Mavis, I haven’t had a lot to eat today. Let’s say you and me go pick something up…”

“Nonsense, I won’t hear of it, Arlen. Why don’t I fix you a sub? I can make it to your liking…” she smiled suggestively.


Amazon Kindle version: The Narcissist Chronicles: The Whole Story


Amazon UK Kindle version: The Narcissist Chronicles: The Whole Story


Barnes & Noble version: The Narcissist Chronicles: The Whole Story


iTunes version: The Narcissist Chronicles: The Whole Story


Kobo version: The Narcissist Chronicles: The Whole Story


Scribd version: The Narcissist Chronicles: The Whole Story https://www.scribd.com/book/230453823/The-Narcissist-Chronicles-The-WHOLE-Story

Smashwords version: The Narcissist Chronicles: The Whole Story


Love Me, Need Me: A Narcissist’s Tale – ‘Author’s Advocate’ Excerpt

love me, need me: a narcissist's tale by lisa maliga ebookBy Lisa Maliga

Copyright 2010 – 2013

Read about the adventures of a bumbling sexual predator that uses the Internet trolling for conquests. Arlen J. Stevenson, a hack zombie author from Alabama, ends up on large social networking site hoping to be the most popular writer there. What happens to him is a fusion of dark humor and unexpected consequences.

Here’s an edited [from R-rated to PG-rated] excerpt from Chapter 5. Enter the mind of a narcissist, as seen from his point of view.

I was languishing in my popularity as the best author’s advocate on the entire Internet. I had to wade through a lot of email lately; many of it from horny ol’ gals way more outspoken than Helena. Some of them could string together their sentences while others were in the deluded state of thinking they were writers but hardly able to use words intelligently.

Up in North Carolina I had a minor author’s advocate just itching like a tick to see me real soon. She was north of fifty, but raring to go. She sweetly wrote to me, “Arlen I just have to have you now and if that’s too blunt for you…” No, Katelynn Brenner, that’s exactly my speed. Now. I want everything now, always have, always will. And if you’re horny and I’m horny, well hell, that’s just the best combination in the whole wide world and then some.    

Katelynn knew I was married, but that wasn’t a problem. It’d be a done deal as soon as she scraped her pennies together from her cheating dog of a husband. Katelynn clearly wanted me so bad and be happy with just being my weekend buddy. Hell, name the time, date and place and we’d be ready for our Friday through Sunday buddy-fest.

Then there was the matter of Candice. She was a hack PP [Promises Publishers] writer who’d never amount to anything literarily, but she came from a decent family and had lots of money. Divorced, three teenagers, a chubby ol’ gal who lived in Georgia and was willing to meet with me any day or night of the week. I had to hint to a longterm relationship as she might’ve been horny but she was kinda on the needy side. Gals like that needed reassurance and that came in the form of the words: “longterm” “relationship” and the seal the deal phrase: “I can see us being together for a long, long time.” I also wasn’t above and beyond throwing in the word “love” here and there, but my strict rule was never before the fifth email exchange. I usually phrased it like this: “I am slowly but surely falling in love with you,” but that was reserved for the real hardcore “in need cases” as I referred to ’em. So far there had only been a few, and I closely monitored them for a potentially sticky situation.

I knew when that verbiage landed in their inboxes I was almost assured of being in their personal inboxes for real. Being the online personage I was, I never knew for sure if some ol’ gal would post pictures of me and the happily “Arlenized” ol’ gal up all over her site and the Reality Writes forum, the “private party page” which was a pretty wild place of writers exchanging some juicy tales. Meeting the women had to be done judiciously. Locals and near-locals were the best because the cost factor didn’t really enter the equation, as no motel rooms were needed. ‘Course they could turn into stalkers and I was god damned lucky that I hadn’t had to deal with that recently. 

Love Me, Need Me: A Narcissist’s Tale is available in paperback and eBook formats.


I WANT YOU: Seduction Emails from a Narcissist ~ An Excerpt

By Lisa Maliga

Copyright 2011-2016

iwantyou (1)Here is an excerpt to show how easy it is for a narcissist/sexual predator/online stalker to find his next willing victim.


This was clearly an online fling that lasted only a few days. Arlen was claiming to be in his no more hornies stage of life but the temptation was too overwhelming when he happened upon a married blonde woman whom he admitted looked like a woman he had known a few years ago.

Date: June 1, 2007

From: Debra

What happened? Where did you go?

From: Triplesmartproductions

Debra, I have no idea. Server must’ve gone down today, then today we’re back on, no explanation or anything. I wish someone would explain it all to me!
Thanks for writing, pretty lady, it’s always great to hear from you.

From: Debra

Thanks for the compliment. And I love the smoochies!!!

So since you are still online, tell me something about yourself that you have never, ever told a living sole before!

From: Triplesmartproductions

Debra, you can never tell this to anyone – I’d rather drink a frozen daquiri than a beer!
Promise not to tell?
Double smoochies if you don’t!

From: Debra

I’m not sure I can keep that one to myself, but I will give it the old college try. As for myself, depends on the tempurature. Wow! This is real investigative work! I am giddy from shock!
Triple smoochies!

From: Triplesmartproductions
You’re a pretty, sweet lady. I’m glad we’re getting to talk, normally during the day and early evening I get so many messages I can’t talk to anyone. You’re fun!
One nose kiss,

From: Debra

Thank you sir! And may I say the same to you. Not the pretty part though. Handsome would do much better in this situation. There is one burning question I have been dying to ask: Is it really hell being popular?
I’ll see your nose kiss and raise you a peck on the neck!

From: Triplesmartproductions

Honestly, sometimes it’s great, sometimes it’s kinda like work. You want to be nice to everyone, but there’s just so many hours in the day. I’m just grateful people seem to like what I write and do, it’s an honor for people to read my stuff.
A peck on the neck? I’ll do one better, I’ll give you one full fledged neck nuzzle!

Date: June 2, 2007

From: Debra

Oops! Did I offend? I apologize if I did. But I do enjoy talking to you and I will read your work and I hope you will stay my friend and this is becoming a runon sentence and I am not exactly sure where I should end it so I will just make a commitment and go out on a limb and end it here!

From: Triplesmartproductions

Darlin, you didn’t offend at all, trust me. You’ll laugh, but I fell asleep at my keyboard, I probably answered over a hundred messages last night!
But only person’s did I answer more than once……

From: Debra

So glad handsome author! Sorry! The pressures of fame must be tremendous! LOL! But seriously folks…I’m sure keeping up with thousands of people on this thing has to be exhausting! My ego is only slightly bruised – nothing fatal.
Thanks also for the multiple answers. So happy we’re getting along…wait for it…famously!
Good morning Smoochies

From: Triplesmartproductions

Darlin’, how are you? We meet again and I’m awake!
Returning good morning smoochies,

From: Debra

I know I’m worth waitng for but did you stay at your computer all night? Hope not, Arlen. Need to keep that strength up.
BTW, should we tell our spouses that we’re having this online fling? I’m almost at the point where I can’t start the day without my Arlen!
Spare smoochies for later on

From: Triplesmartproductions

Darlin’, there’s no reason to let go of what you want, now is there?
I enjoy you, hope you’ll want to continue talkin’.
One good kiss,

From: Debra

I do so agree! I love talking to you! But without coffee, it is a bit challenging. You keep me on my toes, with or without caffeine.
One kiss and a hint of tongue (getting daring now)

From: Triplesmartproductions

Want my private email addy? My manager can access this account, so want to talk elsewhere?
More than a hint of tongue,

From: Debra

Tell you what, my Southern Smoothie. Here is mine and use it if you desire. Xxxxx.xxxxi want you: seduction emails from a narcissist by lisa maliga paperback Ear nibble a quick lick!

I WANT YOU: Seduction Emails from a Narcissist [paperback edition on the right]

ebook links: Amazon Kindle, B&N NOOK, Smashwords

Love Me, Need Me: A Narcissist’s Tale ~ Excerpt

Middle-aged Arlen J. Stevenson hails from Alabama. He’s a bumbling sexual predator, narcissist, and author of three insipid zombie books. His relentless and often hilarious pursuit of women online leads him to our other protagonist, Los Angeles-based writer of term papers, Helena Hoffman. She isn’t aware of what Arlen is as she only sees his amusing and entertaining side in their daily email correspondence.  

Told in alternating points of view, we see Arlen’s self-absorbed lifestyle as he endeavors to meet his numerous catches all over the South. Helena and Arlen get friendlier via their online communication, and he invites her to be his personal manager because of her communications skills, gullibility factor and location. She launches a MySpace site for his new company. Soon he realizes there are thousands of available women in his region alone! Unlike the jailbait that many online stalkers pursue, Arlen chases after their mothers and grandmothers. Helena is aware of his perpetual cheating and decides to investigate it in person. What happens after that is alternately scary and darkly humorous. 


That night I posted up my short story, Zombies At The Kings Country Buffet. The comments came pouring in and I was winning more subscribers and more fans. Some of those ol’ gals were bringing in other ol’ gals. I was sent pictures of some of ‘em and lots of private email addresses and phone numbers. To say my calendar was getting kinda full was a huge understatement. God, I loved MySpace!

A few days later I found time to chat with Helena on the IM but of course I had to remain hidden or else I would’ve been inundated with gals wanting to chat. We discussed the overwhelming success of my short story, one that had been on my web site for years, but over here it had garnered over 60 comments. Danielle in Odessa, Texas wrote about my witty horror tale, saying she was laughing and crying at the same time and she would stay far away from buffets in the future. BlueEyedBlonde wrote, in part: “you have quite a sense of humor about you (Thank GOD !!!) I enjoy your writings…”

Gillian in North Carolina: “I don’t care bout no dam zombies but what you tell me is that u got some balls great big size and I love you writeing”

Frankinzombie wrote: “Because Im a loser baby,now why dont you kill me, that is If I turn into a zombie. Its all fantasy,we know about reality,work,hot girlfriend who likes expensive things,and talks to much while your watching a football game, giving your bud some $ to score some bud, and dosnt show up till the next day,wop-ass time,i know you been pinching my bag mo-fo get the picture,escape from reality,til zombies really happens,its comming soon”

And Robbi Zombie in Pennsylvania wrote: “Arlen, you are one of the finest zombie writers in your genre. Not only do you maintain a level of tension, but it’s interlaced with lots of humor. I wish I could give you 10 kudos!”

Love Me, Need Me: A Narcissist’s Tale is available as an eBook and paperback.

love me, need me: a narcissist's tale by lisa maliga ebook